World’s Dumbest Criminals Wednesday

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Crazy Case of the The Lindow Woman. 

According to Buzzfeed.com, Malika de Fernandez went missing in 1961, and her husband, Peter Reyn-Bardt, was suspected of murdering her. A body was never found, so he was never arrested. When a human skull was found in the Lindow Moss bog in the ’80s, he confessed to killing her and dumping her body near the bog.  Except the skull didn’t belong to Malika.”  The skull belonged to a woman who lived in ancient roman times. Peter and Malika had been married for convenience for less than a year. Initially, they amicably separated, but when Malika turned up at Peter’s residence, where he had been living with a man, she demanded more money and threatened to expose his sexuality. The disagreement escalated, leading to her death. He cut up her body with an ax and buried her on the edge of the bog. Peter confessed to the crime, thinking it was Malika’s skull that was found. He went to trial and was sentenced to life in prison.

Würzburg, Germany

In 2010, an unidentified thief robbed a bank in Würzburg, Germany.  The cops soon released identifying details of the criminal in hopes of catching him.  However, the thief then emailed the police, mocking them for getting their height, age, accent, and method of escape wrong.  The criminal hadn’t realized cops could trace their email address. The authorities tracked him down in a Hamburg gambling hall.

White Powder Thieves

In 2011, three adult men and two juveniles broke into a house in Silver Springs Shores, Florida. The thieves thought they hit the jackpot with a load of white powder they suspected of being an illegal substance. However, upon inhaling the product, they soon realized they were very, very wrong. Instead, it was the ashes of a man and 2 Great Danes. All the thieves were arrested. Weirdly, this isnt an isolated event. In 2015, three teenagers stole from a family member in St. Peters, Missouri. After tasting the white powder in a box, that, too, turned out to be ashes. This time, they belonged to their grandfather, bringing further shame as they were arrested.

Mark Smith

In 2007, Mark Smith who was high on valium and intoxicated, broke into a home.  Smith then, who was tired from being high and intoxicated, took a nap in the homeowner’s bed.  He was woken up by the police and sentenced to 18 months in jail. 

 

Detectives analyzing black and white photos and fingerprints. Investigation process depicted in detailed top view.